How To Use Your Power Of Self Reflection For Personal Growth

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The-art-of-self-reflectionPost written by Ankit Yadav.

It is necessary… for man to go away by himself.. to sit on a rock.. and ask, ‘Who am I, where have I been, and where am I going?” – Carl Sandburg

Life is a direct product of our actions, beliefs and attitudes. We are directly responsible for everything that happens in our lives. Do you agree?

Let’s see three different individuals respond to that statement.

Person 1: “Are you crazy? Look around you. Nothing is in our control. Nothing is for sure. Life is random. Unfair. Some get lucky. Others don’t. If you take a look at my family, not one of them has done anything to deserve the lack they have in their lives today. Life is harsh.”

Person 2: “I believe in God. He is the only real force that exists in the universe. I believe that everything that happens in life is because of him, and he has control over everything. I must make sure I please him so that he blesses me with all the good stuff.”

Person 3: “I absolutely agree with this. Yes, we are responsible for the life we live. We may not have any direct control over the exact events of a normal day, but in the long run we do have the power to direct our life in any specific direction. We do this by the choices we make, the attitudes we show against adversities and the self-belief that we carry within ourselves.”

An Analysis Of The Three Answers

Something unique just happened above. Three people gave three different answers to a common question.

How is this possible? How can a question have three different answers?

If you go through the answers, you should be able to make out that the three people answering the above question have different perspectives.

The first person seems to have a ‘victim’ mindset where life is ‘happening’ to him, and he has no power of discretion over it.

The second person displays a religious interpretation of life. He likes to believe that God is the running force of life, and he needs to make sure he doesn’t displease God.

The third person gives us a proactive outlook to life. He likes to believe that if we act from a positive perspective to life we can attain everything that we want.

You may realize that the difference in the three answers is actually the difference in the character of those three people.

Each person answers according to what he/she understands and believes.

In short, how a person responds (not just to a question, but to a situation or an event in life) can give us a fair idea about his thinking and behaviour.

We can use this fact for our own self reflection.

Using The Power Of Self Reflection

Even though there can be numerous ways for self reflection, this little knowledge can help us to gather some real time data for our own self reflection.

All we need to do is pay attention to our behaviour, our speech, our mental mood, and our predominant thinking.

  • Notice the adjectives that you use in your sentences.
  • Do you frequently use sarcasm in your conversations? Could it have anything to do with some amount of unprocessed anger, possibly collected within you for a long time?
  • Do you feel genuinely happy when someone shares their joy with you?
  • Would you help someone, if you knew there was nothing to be gained from it?
  • Do you believe your life is good?
  • How often do you smile happily?

In conclusion, all these questions can help you realize what kind of a person you are growing into. You can check for your kindness, happiness, joy etc from the associated feelings, attitudes and beliefs.

All you need to do is take a look at your response to various stimuli.

Ankit Yadav is a post graduation student of Computer Science. He is passionate about personal development and loves to write about his ideas. His goal is to find meaning and purpose in life and help anyone and everyone who wants to do the same. You can follow his work on

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